Shopping

My little non-shopping sprees for fat-lady, sun-protective garments ended last week on a high note. I bought a hat. It was $10.00 and is for fishing. It looks like something Joe Bubba would wear in his bass boat, but it fit my fat head and the price was right. Rowdy was with me when I got it and he nodded approvingly (something he did NOT do when I tried on all the Audrey Hepburn hats and the Jackie O hats...let's face it, I'm so much closer in style to Joe Bubba than any female fashion icon). Anyway, I wore it for the rest of the day, just to get used to it. It gave me a) a terrific headache and b) hat hair. I solved the first problem with my standard get-rid-of-headache-recipe...two ibuprofen downed by a Diet Coke. I solved the second (I thought), by getting a haircut.

I wanted something that would stay chic under a hat. (Actually, the word "chic" is snortingly funny when used in any way to describe my hair now, then, 30 years ago or ten years from now).

I got a trim from a smoker who breathed minty-smokey-garlicky breath on me while discussing my thinning hair and telling me that all hats didn't have to be as ugly as that one. I gave her a $2.00 tip, left hating the haircut and came home to give the hat to DH. HE loves it.

All this shopping lately has brought about one major change in the herewegoagain household---
Rowdy now gets a "clothing allowance". This happened because I was getting tired of going into stores with him dragging behind me fruitlessly trying to find long-sleeved shirts for me only to find MANY articles of clothing he wanted/needed. He is fourteen after all, and suddenly interested in expensive shoes, name-brand jeans and deoderant.

We settled on $25.00 a month. I explained to him that $25.00 a month meant that if he knew he would need say, a $50.00 jacket in the fall...then he should save up for that. I told him, "I don't spend $25.00 a month on clothes for you right now, but maybe every few months, I spend $100.00 or so". I thought he got it. I gave him the money on April 1. By um, April 1, he had spent it all.

OK, that would be fine, if not for the conversation the following day.

"Mom, I need underwear", he yelled as he rooted through the laundry.

I told him that I had done all the laundry and it was either in the dryer or put away. (I'm not the perfect housewife/mother for nothing). He told me that wasn't what he meant...he meant, he needed underwear. As in more than three pairs.

"You only have three pairs of underwear?" I questioned. "Why didn't you buy some underwear with your money yesterday?". (Well, I knew the answer to that...he was way too busy buying graphic t-shirts and shorts--necessities that they are).

I then explained that the whole idea behind "clothing allowance" was that he was now old enough to make mature decisions about buying even boring stuff like socks and underwear. He nodded seriously and told me that he HAD considered that he needed some, but then decided the smart thing was too wait.

"I just grow out of underwear too fast. I decided not to buy any till I stop growing".

Yeah, really, why buy anything you might grow out of? (Which I do with regularity, more's the pity. ) It certainly didn't stop him from buying outrageously expensive tennis shoes when his feet are growing faster than any flowering plant I have in my garden. Actually, I'm with him on this whole issue of not buying till I stop growing, which is why I'm still looking for fat-girl UVA/UVB stuff...and which is why, yes, I do laundry every day.

I told Rowdy he would just have to wait till May for new underwear. He took the news just fine and loudly packed one pair for the three-day trip to Austin we took last weekend. I ignored it. I'm PARENTING him. And anyway, it's good for me to know he is short on shorts, as it were....

Three pairs of underwear keep me moving the loads right along. My dishes might be dirty, but there is now an urgency to my laundry that keeps my laundry room clean. He needs his undies and I need my one fat-girl shirt. We're such a team.